Posted by mair on February 18, 2005, at 16:44:27
In reply to Re: Sense of Self Redux, posted by rockymtnhi on February 17, 2005, at 20:37:43
I wasn't able to go in and tell her in specific terms what I didn't want to talk to her about but I could tell her that I hadn't wanted to come because there were things I couldn't talk about, and I was able to talk with her about general categories of what those "things" were. I've told her many times in the past that I wanted to cancel a session. I told her yesterday that one reason I don't cancel sessions is that I can't lie about why I'm cancelling. If I could just call up and leave a message like I've got to take my kid to the doctor, that would be one thing. But my message would be more on the order of I can't come because there are things I don't want to talk about and I don't want to spend an awkward 50 minutes trying not to talk about the things that are on my mind. I'm pretty sure that she'd call me back and talk me into coming in. If I'm going to be talked into retracting my cancellation, there doesn't seem to much point to cancelling to begin with.
Just not showing doesn't seem to be a viable alternative either - I'm so reliable about coming and coming on time that I really do think she'd worry if I just failed to show up.
Her big point to me yesterday is that even though I couldn't talk much about the things really bothering me, she learned alot more from the things I could say than she would have known if I hadn't shown up altogether.
I know she's right; it's just so damn uncomfortable.
Mair
poster:mair
thread:459478
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050218/msgs/460073.html