Posted by muffled on December 6, 2005, at 16:22:47
In reply to Re: Hey Alex, and Cricket » muffled, posted by cricket on December 6, 2005, at 10:53:50
> Hang in there Muffled.
***THANKS!!
>
> I know my T had a stint where I felt like he was only talking to my voices. I didn't like it at all. I felt very left out. But it's hard. It was hard for him (T) to figure out how much to engage them. It was hard for me to figure out how much I wanted them engaged.
***I am wondering if there's jealousy happening with mine? Dunno. Gona have to take some time and try and sort it out.
>
> Very thin tightrope to walk all around I think.
>
> Also, sometimes my T misunderstood my different voices which felt like double misunderstandment because I felt misunderstood then too.
***:(
>
> But I tell you the biggest advantage that talking about them or sometimes just letting them talk brought me - normalization.
***Yeah, i think thats gonna be a big thing for me as well. Alex was saying as how they just want to be recognized and aknowledged. I think thats a big thing with my kid. Real big....and I keep ignoring her.:(
>
> It suddenly felt okay to have these voices, to talk back to them, to disagree with them, to cry with them, be angry with them, feel sorry for them. All of a sudden (maybe it was more gradual but it felt sudden) I felt okay with it. Not freakish, not ready to be locked away. I felt okay. I still do.
***When I first found my parts I was thrilled. Alla sudden so much stuff made sense. I wasn't nearly so perpetually confused. the noise just calmed right down.
But now I'm not so happy, cuz its real. I am hurting and causing pain to a person, just a kid. Sh*t. And she has emotions and sh*t that I don't do. Sh*t. And she's needy. Sh*t. And she's illogical. Sh*t. And she calls me on stuff. Sh*t. She makes me feel like I'm the bitch from hell cuz I so mean to her. Sh*t. I need her if I wanna be whole. Sh*t.
Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............Thanks Cricket,
Muffled, or something.PS Wrot about my session elsewhere, it was ok. My T is pretty smart I guess. However I will NOT get attached.
poster:muffled
thread:584583
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051206/msgs/586166.html