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Re: InsideKids back, but won't let me 'hug' her...... » muffled

Posted by Tamar on December 9, 2005, at 15:15:02

In reply to InsideKids back, but won't let me 'hug' her......, posted by muffled on December 9, 2005, at 14:46:34

> she ran away. I was feeling so proud of her over something and I quite spontaneously went to 'hug' her, just like I do with my IRL kids, and she dissappeared. Why do you suppose 'I' can't hug her? I know she HATES touch, but from me?
> It kinda made me feel bad.....:(
> I don't understand.
> Muffled

My IRL kids sometimes don’t want to be hugged. I always feel a bit hurt. I was asking my six year-old today whether she’ll still sit on my lap when she’s 23. She asked me if I’d sit on her grandmother’s lap. I said we could suggest it (but my mother is 65 and half my size…)

I wonder if your inside kid wants you to understand how strict her boundaries are, and wants you to verbalise your love and comfort.

Of course it hurts… but it’s one of the few ways she has of asserting herself. She probably just wants to be understood…

Tamar


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051206/msgs/587436.html