Posted by kerria on July 26, 2006, at 8:31:59
In reply to Re: In therapy tonight- i heard a part- hates me:( » kerria, posted by Tamar on July 26, 2006, at 5:03:21
> Hi Kerria,
>
> I don’t have DID so I don’t know if my experiences are quite the same, but I have sets of feelings that I identify as younger selves. I don’t know if it’s the same thing as having parts, but it’s certainly a real aspect of my identity at the moment.
>
> Anyway, there’s a 13 year-old who is basically OK and wants to fit in, and likes me most of the time, although she thinks I’m totally uncool and she hates it when I do things that embarrass her. There’s also an 18 year-old who frequently despises me, but nevertheless wants me to look after her.
>
> I think negative emotions are really hard to deal with, especially when they come from within you and are directed against you. I tend to think that most negative emotions – anger, criticism, hatred – come out of pain and fear. So maybe this very critical part is hurting and is criticising you and other parts as a way of trying to protect herself.
>
> Do your parts talk to one another? Can you or one of your other parts ask the critical part why she’s picking on you? Maybe tell her you don’t understand why she’s being so mean to you?
>
> It must feel awful to feel so hated. And inner conflict is never easy. Getting all the parts to play nice isn’t easy at all. But maybe you can work on ways to help them to tolerate each other and you? Just because they don’t always like what you say and do, it doesn’t mean you are doing things wrong. And like the rest of us, maybe they can learn to resign themselves to other people’s imperfections.
>
> I hope things get easier for you soon.
>
> Tamar
>
>
> Thank you Tamar so much for writing. That someone hears is comforting. It feels like no one is on my side - even me.No - i can't communicate with my parts. It's specific things that this part hates me for. i was shocked that she brought up things i forgot about a long time ago.
i wish my T didn't ask her out- he addressed 'the one inside that hated me' .
poster:kerria
thread:670607
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060721/msgs/670664.html