Posted by Honore on January 13, 2007, at 11:06:52
In reply to Re: Dream » Honore, posted by Dinah on January 12, 2007, at 17:15:44
Hi, Dinah.
I think a lot of what's going on IRL, and in the dream, is about asking for help, or what kind of help you can ask for.
It's not really something the dream tells me much about, but it's probably one of the biggest issues between me and my T. Of course, including him, I suppose-- I don't really expect help from people. I tend to see people as kind of malevolent and vengeful, or harmful (not only to me, but as an attitude to people that they'll inflict on me), or incompetent or so indifferent that they just aren't paying enough attention to find whatever it is that I need.
And there's this profound mistrust or distrust and even anger that comes out of that belief-- even toward people I don't know-- more like an expectation that they'll fail to do the right thing-- or even to know, or be able to know. what the right thing is. I feel as if it's my fault, in a way-- that the right thing, for me, is always arcane or hard to find, and that no one is going to want to bother, or succeed.
And since I'm expecting them to do it wrong, I start with this kind of hopeless resentment of having to ask at all.
I think I don't really ask-- I mostly just end up really upset and angry-- at them and myself.
Not that that's in the dream, but it is such a huge huge block in my life from doing anything, literally anything.
I'm really feeling stuck about that.
Thanks for seeing that. I really hope you're okay.
{{{Dinah}}}
Honore
poster:Honore
thread:721648
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070103/msgs/721937.html