Posted by Poet on January 22, 2007, at 11:01:02
In reply to Re: Frustrated, posted by DannaB on January 21, 2007, at 22:31:58
Hi DannaB,
I understand your frustration, I'm feeling it right now, too.
> It's true in a way, I suppose, that things have improved. For instance, my funks are usually less deep and scary than before. I am still hard on myself, but I don't beat myself up like I used to. And...I'm much more forgiving of others and able to see them in a less "black or white" way.
I beat myself up all the time, I think it's progress that you aren't doing it anymore.
>
> But what I really want is to feel happy. Energized. Excited. I want to feel a zest for life. I want life to have meaning. I want a purpose. Instead, i just float along. There is no real purpose, goal, or love that drives me.
>I can identify with this. I have convinced myself the key to happiness is career. Naturally, I am currently unemployed. My T tries hard to show me other things where I do succeed: I am doing good in school and water aerobics, but those things aren't a real purpose. Negative me says school won't lead to a job and water aerobics won't make me thin and happy. Gee, think I'm a bit negative today?
> The only thing that would make me happy is being in a good relationship. I'm in one right now, but we are struggling to make it work and I don't know if he's as invested as I am (sigh). I need to find something else to give me fulfillment because one just can't count on a relationship.This is very true, for me I have a relationship, but that darn career would make me happy.
I know I need to try to find happiness with school even though I know it won't get me the ultimate happiness. Maybe it's time I made a list of things that I do well and see how it goes.
Poet
poster:Poet
thread:724857
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070119/msgs/725150.html