Posted by Scentedgarden on January 28, 2007, at 17:29:42
i know all my posts have been long... i'm sorry if i bored you all..?
i know i already said this but, i'm in so much pain
and i ahve a few hrs thinking i can cope, and have a handle on it all....
then, bam! ...i think of looking at her and seeing her beautiful face , and not knowing what to say...
how do you say so you got married then? last september..thanks for letting me figure it out for myself, therapist..
she has tried to protect me, but all that time i was still in lovce with her... so , i wish she had told me...
did she think i'd never find out?
did she think i was so stupid i couldnt see her huge diamond encrusted platnum gold wedding ring..?
its night time again here 11.30 pm....and i have my insides being breaten to peieces with this emotion..
and i thought of killing myself today...but i managed not to do that... i prayed and it went away...but now its back ... its deep insdie my right hand side ...just so much pain trapped inside..
i dont ssee her till 27th feb, and i already cant bear the hought of it...so im thinking of calling the whole thing off...
i dont think im that strong anymore to be able to hide and be happy, and just be someone she would want to know outside...
i have to go ..for my own sanity
but what a pity that will be...
3 ND HALF YEARS IN THERPAY..SO LEAVE BUT I CANT FACE ADMITTING I LOVE HER...
SHE WONT LIKE IT...
SHE WONT LOOOK AT IT...
IS IT POSSIBLE SJE LIKES ME AS A NORMAL PERSON, AND MAYBE EVEn HAS FANTasys about me too?
oh...im in agony ..!!!
aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!1
please anyone help me ...
poster:Scentedgarden
thread:727533
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070119/msgs/727533.html