Posted by Honore on September 7, 2007, at 14:47:59
In reply to Re: RealMe - how did it go today? 'slight trigger' » Wittgenstein, posted by RealMe on September 7, 2007, at 10:41:37
That sounds like one of those appointments where you feel one uncomfortable thing after another-- but you handle them-- and so it seems like you're walking that fine line between working through and falling into the old despair-- and you wonder at yourself a little.
Sometimes I feel like one of those primitive animations they used to have, where a face would go back and forth from frowning to smiling, as you moved it in the light-- sometimes I feel as if I'm rickocheting between being upset and realizing that I don't have to be upset, that I can work with a feeling or thought or memory. And then the bad feelings, or pain or whatever it is, comes back-- and I have to remember yet again that I don't have to be captured by it-- so it's a palpable victory. Not easy, but something you can really know.
It must have felt like such an odd coincidence, too-- his mentioning a patient-- after TherapyGirl's experience-- That's such a close resonance-- after the discussion here. Even if the situation is different-- you must have felt so strange..-- as well as that he was saying that he had seen your work-- which feels private and something you should have the right to control access to. It's such a doubling of that sense of spheres not being as separate as you'd like.
Still, today's appointment was so much much better than you imagined. Each time you handle things, your ability to do it and your connection to your T, gets stronger. I feel that about myself-- even if at times I lose hope, like today--and I know it must be happening for you.
Thanks also very much for the good thoughts about me-- although I'm not sure I deserve them.
Honore
poster:Honore
thread:781338
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070904/msgs/781418.html