Posted by anneofkana on September 11, 2007, at 22:21:22 [reposted on September 12, 2007, at 0:30:08 | original URL]
DH found out in July. June and July were sheer hell for me. The guilt, the addiction and the shame were driving me crazy. I thought about moving out of state to get away from T. I even had passive suicidal thoughts. I felt totally hopeless. I fell in love with him big time. He told me he loved me too and then said he had too much to drink when he told me (we met one evening). We had sex 5 times.. at this office and other places after hours. I was so addicted to him that there was no escape.
I found out that I was not his first. He had an affair a few months before me (not sure if she was a patient or not, allthough he said he had them with patients before ethics were such a big deal) It sent me over the edge, especially since I used no protection, thinking he had been celebate in his 23 year marriage.
Went to another state for intensive therapy with DH. DH has contacted him to settle out of court. DH is an attorney. I have to stay out of it for now, DH is very angry at T. I went to T for help, got infatuated as many clients do, fell inlove actually, and had sex with him.
I have not been able to work, go to school or do much of anything. I am a wreck. Truly a wreck. I have not talked with T in almost two months, when I called and told him about DH knowing facts. He had no concern about me, only himself.
I feel like such a fool. I want to hear his voice so bad but am afraid to contact him. I am expected to report this or other T will. This is so horrible. I wonder how long it will take me to recover.
I love my DH, but I also love T. I would think if T cared anything about ME, he would attempt to contact me. Guess he is afraid of DH and ramifications of his actions.
At first I felt guilty... ME... after almost 70 hours of intensive therapy out of state I realized that HE is the one responsible. Many woman fall for their T's, it is THEIR JOB to maintain professional boundries, not have sex with their clients.
This all sounds so good, but I am dieing inside. The tears flow too frequent and my heart is aching so badly. T said he didn't love his wife, blah, blah, blah....
Yes, I am also a professional and I am out of commission right now.
Please don't get involved with you T no matter how wonderful you think he may be. It is not worth the emotional pain that comes along with it..
poster:anneofkana
thread:782372
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070904/msgs/782372.html