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Re: all alone » muffled

Posted by Dory on September 15, 2007, at 22:59:08

In reply to Re: all alone » Dory, posted by muffled on September 15, 2007, at 19:38:10

it's not weird at all... but it makes me sad

i am in a really devastated state of mind. i just saw some short films with friends and i feel traumatized and shaken. The material turned out to be very dark... well done but disturbing... especially to me. i walked out white as a sheet.

a few years ago...several... i had an inexperienced, untrained and well-meaning person dig through my past with me... but i can't talk about that. i mention it because it affects what will happen and is happening with therapy. From my understanding, progress moves in a halting way...rapid then slow, jumpy. Memory floods me from time to time.. and something in me has imediately taken notice that i have started past work. i found myself just staring into space while out walking... i had stopped for a second and the stack of memories flashed through my head so hard and so fast i was left just standing there.

the films tonight sent me into some dark places in my mind... flashes which are tied to some power and painful memories. i am washed away...

i thought the outting tonight was safe.. i had no way to know.. i feel sick.


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