Posted by meme3842 on June 6, 2008, at 22:58:49
In reply to Re: question about letting go of a therapist » meme3842, posted by lucie lu on May 31, 2008, at 19:22:51
Hi, Lucie Lu
I've never thought about it as ambigous grief, but that makes sense to me. Thank you for the book recommendation. I'll check out the book by Pauline Boss I've just started to open up to my current therapist about feeling the longing. I think she is being to understand. I hope so anyway...well, she hasn't told me I'm crazy yet, so that's a good sign. What's is funny/ironic about it all is that it's difficult to express to people in my day to day life that I miss my therapist, and yet, it's such a big loss.
Thanks,
Meme> Hi meme- it sounds to me as if you are experiencing unresolved or ambiguous grief. You sound so sad about that previous relationship. There is some information - e.g. I know that Pauline Boss has written at least one book on ambiguous loss, which includes loss of people who are important to you and alive but unavailable. It is only natural to grieve those that we love who are no longer with us. Where it becomes a problem is when you cannot move on after a reasonable amount of time. My T says that holding onto such grief can be a way of keeping the connection alive when other means fail. I think that it a wise observation. Can you perhaps get in touch with her and trade emails or snail-mails occasionally or even on an infrequent, but regular basis? If this doesn't satisfy your need, then perhaps she has fulfilled a need in you that remains lacking in your life? If so, you should explore this with your present T. I feel for you. -LL
poster:meme3842
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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080524/msgs/833395.html