Posted by onceupon on December 23, 2008, at 9:30:25
In reply to Grief, posted by DAisym on December 23, 2008, at 2:46:36
I won't pretend to know what it's like to have adult children growing up, and maybe away. It seems like it might be especially difficult to grieve this without a partner to grieve with. So one loss becomes a reminder of multiple losses.
And as for this:
"Grief is a funny thing. It hurts deep inside and refuses to give over to cleaning or baking or working. It wants quiet - it wants the sappy movies and the slow love-gone-wrong songs. It wants the pain to be felt and acknowledged. And I've yet to figure out how to stop grieving for things long since past."
I think it's beautiful that you know what *your* grief needs - even if it might be easier to acknowledge what it needs rather than to give it what it needs. My personal pattern is to push grief as far away as possible. A part of me wishes I could feel the grief more fully, because it might not feel so daunting then (at least that's how my thoughts about it go). Maybe it's not so much about *not* grieving things long since past, but changing the nature or the intensity of the grief?
At any rate, I'll be thinking about you - and the rest of us who might be struggling during this holiday season. Take gentle care.
poster:onceupon
thread:870414
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/870439.html