Posted by raisinb on January 23, 2009, at 13:42:48
In reply to Attitudes and Judgements, posted by DAisym on January 22, 2009, at 21:13:06
I think it's very taxing for us, as humans, to experience others as subjects, not objects (to be open, not judgmental). There is so much difference between us that it creates a good deal of anxiety and frustration.
There are times I'm convinced my therapist would say judgmental things about me to her husband or friends. There are other times I feel her caring so intensely that I can't imagine she'd do that. But maybe it's not either-or--maybe letting off steam outside sessions enables the loving openness inside them.
Dinah--I have literally thrown expensive books about therapy in the trash when I was angry about something judgmental the author said. I remember vividly one book I read argued that it was essential for clients to have a "corrective emotional experience," and in the same breath mentioned that one of his clients was "pathetically isolated, narcissistic, and alone."
Of course, I read it several times before I chucked it. I think my therapist said something I perceived as judgmental, and at home alone late at night, when I couldn't yell at her, I substituted throwing the book in the trash and dumping leftovers on top of it. There are all kinds of transitional objects in the world!
poster:raisinb
thread:875522
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/875632.html