Posted by fleeting flutterby on January 24, 2009, at 20:20:15
In reply to Re: Least favorite words/phrases from therapists. » fleeting flutterby, posted by Dinah on January 24, 2009, at 18:50:03
> Whoa. I know that some people find therapists like that helpful, but I wouldn't have lasted a month.<<
-----Yea, I don't think it was a good "fit" for me either. I just didn't know any different at the time and I blamed myself for feeling triggered and stuck. I truly thought I was doing things wrong. *sigh*.....
> > "You are more like your mother than you realize"....
>
> Oh wow. Wow. If my therapist said that, he'd have a lot of explaining to do. Even in my marriage it has been identified as something that would not be considered acceptable in any circumstance whatsoever. Even in our biggest arguments, or even if I say it myself, that is considered a low blow and completely unacceptable.<<----- Exactly-- it is a "low blow", like you said.(it's nice you understand but I'm sorry also that you understand) ...it hurt to hear that, as I've tried so hard my whole life to NOT be like my mother-- i've made such a conscious effort of it.
thank the stars for my new T.(i'm scared though, as I fear she is too good to be true and something will present itself to show me so.... yipes....) -- she has said to me that it's like there is a line-- abusive and self centeredness is on one side... then there is a happy healthy medium..... and then there is the other side where one becomes invisible and doesn't express wants or needs..... she said my mom is on the self centered side and I am way way over on the other side.... maybe not an ideal place for me -- BUT, I accomplished it-- I am NOT like my mother. :o)
(T. has said I need to get more in the middle of that line..... just not sure how that's going to happen...*sigh*....)
thanks for this thread.... felt good to express some things....
flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:875827
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/875965.html