Posted by seldomseen on January 28, 2009, at 21:03:21
I only commented on a small part of it in the above post to Dinah.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/876878.html
I usually see my therapist in the afternoon, but he is sooooo much better in the morning. He won't admit this, but he is. I had a 9:00 am appointment.
He looked so nice in a clean starched white shirt and freshly laundered pants. Usually by the time I get to him, he is all rumpled, he's constantly pulling his socks up, and his pants have a coffee stain or two on them. In his defense, however, therapy is hard work and although he stays in his chair, he is very active. Further, the place where we both get therapy coffee lately *has* been having a problem with leaky cups, but I digress.
So we talked about the bottom falling out, and how I was climbing back up, or at least scurrying along the bottom in a moderate to highly functioning manner.
We also talked about how my parents, in particular my father, would react when I was sick. It came as no shock to me, but they didn't react appropriately. Through our conversation, I began to really understand some of my thinking regarding my own physical illnesses and "mood" disturbances as well.
Don't make a big deal of it if you aren't well, don't infect anyone else and above all else, don't trouble anyone. I learned, and am unlearning those lessons, very well.
I guess that's why I see my therapist as superman when he says he is not afraid of anything that I have to say. He can't be infected by me. That's big news in the little Seldom's world. Big news.
I also have a very childlike approach to both physical and "mental" illness. I tend to think what is going on in the present is what things will be like in the future. Just like a child only sees the now, and not the later. It's no wonder relatively mild ailments like a bad cold, or the mild flu throw me way off kilter. I can't talk about it, I'd better not make anyone else sick and I can't see a life when I am well.
Well, my logical brain can see it, it can see a lot of things, but my gut/heart/mind can not. I was trained that way.
But, I pretty convinced that I can be re-trained.
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:876893
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/876893.html