Posted by elizabeth31 on October 14, 2009, at 18:10:48
In reply to Re: i don't like women therapists-whats wrong with, posted by jane d on October 14, 2009, at 3:03:09
Great feedback and it definitely helped me think through different opinions and sort through my thoughts-thanks! I did want to make a quick clarification as in my post it wasn't clear but it was ME the one saying "cute purse, nice lipstick....blah blah blah" and getting off topic in that direction, the woman therapist Im sure was simply being polite and trying to get to know me so Im sure it wasn't her fault--but, what I have noticed is that the female therapists I talk to allow ME to more easily manipulate them and get things off topic (just ask a mother about her children)
My main point wasn't that women therapists weren't qualified because I'm sure they are- it was trying to figure out how to deal with my thoughts when I've noticed this pattern and preference. I think as Jane and others helped put it best into perspective for me when pointing out how limited the reality of this entire therapy relationship is...sure putting yourself into uncomfortable situations allows you to work through these feelings but the application towards real life within these settings is not likely to ever occur nor problematic in my life in anyway. I think most people gravitate towards finding a therapist similar to the parent they grew up loving *most* and while that in itself creates attachment problems worthy of another post, I actually have come to terms with the fact that since I never had a mother figure growing up and have accepted this as the hands of cards I was dealt in life-Im not seeking that out now. I think therapists do tend to become a "parent figure" we long for and want the nurturing environment--I don't really think its the women therapists but more I can't be comfortable with a woman in a motherly position and thats probably a significant limitation to my personal circumstances that would indicate sticking with male therapists who I feel more comfortable around naturally would be the better option for me. Maybe its just me being financially aware but therapy is an additional expense and I would not want to waste my money on a male or female therapist who I didnt connect with and feel comfortable with being myselfbut thats just me!
poster:elizabeth31
thread:920447
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090907/msgs/920931.html