Posted by baseball55 on July 7, 2016, at 10:37:02
In reply to Re: trusting your T » rockerr, posted by Dinah on July 6, 2016, at 22:55:55
Some people have what they call negative transference in therapy, where they bring to the therapy relationship all the problems in their previous relationships (i.e., lack of trust, feeling that people don't care about you, etc.) I can see why your therapist said that about ending therapy. If, after 3 years, you can't overcome your distrust and you have had this problem with other therapists and been unable to work through it, it may be that individual therapy isn't going to work for you. You might want to try group therapy, where you get a better sense of how you relate to others (non-therapists).
I don't know what your issues are though, what kind of therapy you do (dynamic, CBT?), what you are looking for in therapy.
Maybe, as Dinah said (Hi, Dinah!) the point of therapy is to learn to trust and that's the main issue you need to work on. I imagine that distrusting people and feeling uncared for effects your other relationships?
In Erik Erickson's stages of growth model, he locates trust/mistrust as the basic, first stage, established in early childhood.
Trust and feeling uncared for were my basic issues when I started therapy. After a few years, I told my therapist that I would like to give him something meaningful, something exquisite. He said I had already given him the most meaningful gift he could imagine - a relationship of mutual trust. It took a long time though and it was always clear to him (if not to me), that this was a fundamental issue we needed to work on.
For me, though, I had a positive transference, imagining him as the parent I had always wished I had.
poster:baseball55
thread:1090209
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20150512/msgs/1090235.html