Posted by mist on October 14, 2000, at 23:48:20
In reply to Friends, posted by Cass on October 12, 2000, at 18:40:31
Cass, these people are treating you badly and they are weak. You have good values and admirable courage in standing up for what you believe. These "friends" are treating you in a rude, disrespectful, antagonizing way. When I've been forced to be around people like that I let them have their reactions to what I say, then at a later time I again make a strong and clear statement about what I believe. They give up eventually because they realize I (my convictions, rather) are not going to go away. I'll just keep stating them over and over (at various appropriate times), forcing my critics to either shut up or keep challenging me. Most weak people will give up when someone is acting on the offensive rather than the defensive in expressing their views on issues such as you mentioned (although you can never attack anyone, of course--it's all about the issues.) This strategy may not work for everyone, and I don't do it with friends.If I had friends like that I would immediately drop them. There are people who share your beliefs in the world. Unfortunately, some people who care about the values of humanity and justice, etc. treat others poorly on an individual level. Not all, however. Keep looking. In the meantime, in my opinion, being alone for awhile is better than being with people like that. For one thing, their behavior towards you runs the risk of lowering your self-esteem, which could make it harder for you to reach out to new people with confidence. Good luck, you're a good person, the world needs people like you.
poster:mist
thread:1011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001011/msgs/1075.html