Posted by shelliR on May 22, 2001, at 9:50:11
In reply to Re: memories » shelliR, posted by Marie1 on May 22, 2001, at 9:09:21
> Hi Kate,> My question to you is: do you think it's necessary to remember *everything* in order to get past this (if that's even possible)? I'm really feeling reluctant to go to my therapy app't, this week because I know he'll want to talk about it. A trip to the dentist for root canal would be a day at the beach in comparison! :-}
>
I think your first question is the answer I would give, that it may not be possible to remember *everything* and I've been told by different people (therapists included) that it's not necessary. But the other part, about the shame, I think is imperative. I think (and it's just my opinion, of course) that it's absolutely necessary to talk about what you know about it enough to not feel the shame. If you are reluctant to talk about it with your therapist, you should still be talking about it.Shame is the a horrible feeling to carry around. It affects your total self esteem and is probably the most important thing that anyone wants to get rid of in therapy, whether they have been sexually abused or not. Most everyone carries around shame from the past and I suspect that is what most people spend a lot of time in therapy about. Shame is the worst because it usually has to do with something that's not our fault (different from embarrassment, or guilt). So yes, keeping talking!
Shelli
poster:shelliR
thread:6088
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010511/msgs/6128.html