Posted by Temmie on July 23, 2003, at 6:11:29
In reply to Re: Still Reeling in Confusion and Hurt of Infidelity, posted by Mercury on July 23, 2003, at 0:55:37
Thank you, both. Mercury, I appreciate the male point of view (and your excellent explanation of alcoholic behavior). You've done such a nice job answering my questions (and I should probably stake out a few Al-Anon meetings). Fallsfall -- both of you -- you're right. I've got to STOP. I called him yesterday, and what the h*ll for? I was working on a presentation at a friend's house last night and thought about it all the way home ('round midnight, feeling week and lonely, and half-wishing we could talk again) -- I was wondering -- good grief -- what had gotten into me? Contacting Paul was tantamount to tacit approval of what he'd done (where did THOSE fancy words come from), and also didn't/doesn't make him accountable for consequences re, behaviors which I'd always said were crossing the line. Is this making sense? (So, Mercury -- I was thinking, "Dang it, I've gotta stop calling." And Fallsfall -- I was also thinking, "Just a day at a time." In fact, I was even thinking I could pay myself, or give myself a sticker or something -- for each 24-hour chunk of time I made it through without initiating contact. Hanging up the phone is going to be another matter, but ... I can get there. I can turn my ringer off. I can get a new cell number. I can just hang up.
Thank you for supporting me and for spelling things out -- plain and simple.
** Should I return things to him then? Books, photos? The "dialogue journal" we had? **
And, Mercury, I have a nice plair of Liz Claiborne jeans, and sandals with a bit of a heel, and a snug (but attractive) top for Thursday night. Woo hoo! It can't hurt to just meet and talk with another, will surely benefit my self-esteem (assuming I get a favorable response). I'm still working on "shaking my thang" (even though it's so unlike me), and I'll keep you all posted. Heck if I pay myself $5 a day between now and Thursday, I can even by myself a new lipstick. (!) Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It really helps to have everything spelled out CLEARLY! I'm going to read and reread the Q&A post. XXX, Temmie
poster:Temmie
thread:244403
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030719/msgs/244433.html