Posted by 64Bowtie on May 18, 2013, at 4:53:03
My dear <<<Dinah>>>,
<<< People tend to [AVOID] what hurts, and that may be feelings that come from the interaction or feelings that come from guilt at previous [AVOIDANCE] or whatever. It's hard to tell.<<<
>>> I'm just now struggling with the "innards" of this topic, [AVOIDANCE], ergo, witty little lead in, "Avoid Avoidance"... On the one hand, following the dictates of our parents for about the first eight years of life can keep us from getting squashed by the random stuff the Universe throws at us... This is less to do with being good and obedient, and more to do about nurturing our assembly of library or encyclopeadia of things to watch out for, that can cause harm... What comes to mind is, "Never forget to look both ways when crossing a busy street", thereby avoiding time wasted by being hospitalized; needless to say our lives are often saved by this simple invocation...
About the time we reach 40 years, we usually have settled for the simpler life chock full of the several versions of this phrase and others... At about age 15, we start claiming our unique and distinct territory for ourselves... Along with this comes the enormous force of responsibility, and with it, choices to make...
Yes, intrinsic to responsibility and choices is a strong sense of right V.S. wrong, in order to be successful... Many of us make the simple leap into "f*rt" logic, such as, "Well, if [TOPIC] is good enough for me, then everyone should [AVOID] this or that person, place, thing, or idea... That posture has served me well; also from here on out"...
Somethings work better after practicing limiting [AVOIDANCE]... We must study limits while generalizing and incorporating some of the myriad rules to live by, or we fail in a dust cloud of over-activity...
This is like a "Movie Trailer" version of what I am writing about concerning [AVOIDANCE]... I may split the topic into 2 chapters... Wait and see what works...
I am so grateful to you for trusting me back in 2003... I had just submitted my final rewrite of my thesis to be published, so I was toooo arrogant to listen well... So, thank you again, Sweetie... Have you reconsidered what I had suggested was your destiny??? You are one of my favorites at communications... I still think you make a good therapist; a "T" person... Keep up the good work!!! >>>
Rod
poster:64Bowtie
thread:1043844
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20130409/msgs/1043844.html