Posted by alexandra_k on September 22, 2018, at 23:08:28
In reply to Re: Partlycloudy, posted by alexandra_k on September 22, 2018, at 22:56:07
and the anonymity, the illusion of it. the removal from everyday life. if i'm talking to the people in my real world life they have an interest in keeping me weak and powerless so they can puff out their own chests and feel powerful and rich. these aren't people who have chosen to help me grow and develop. these aren't people who have my interests at heart. and i do what i can to minimse the amount of time i spend with these people, becuase these people are not good for me. i know that. and they know that.
why haven't i found people who would be good for me? i actually suspect it is largely because of the aforemnetioned people who have more of an interest in keeping me away from the people who would be good for me. more of an interest in keeping me kicked back and weak...
i don't really want these people who i know (who i know of) irl to be stabotaging things for me left right and centre. only... pretty sure that's what they have been...
i met people on these boards who didn't have vested interest in things being worse for me irl.
i felt genuinely cared about here, for a time. i genuinely cared about others on these boards... i learned to care for other people, here. and care for myself. come to recognise irl for the toxic situation that it is / was.
i do want to help people and i genuinely wouldn't treat others as badly as others have treated me. i am different from them and that is why i deserve to have more than them in life. i mean... when it is crunch time and power against power the power that is responsive to reason and the power that has the empathic capacity to see...
i don't know.
i'm tired of being disabled by here. this horrible country with the horrible people in charge of it in teh 'easiest economy in the world in which to do business' which only means it's impossible to trade, here. it's a country of... uncivilised psychopaths.
only... what you gonna do about it? The energy and effort and time that is required to be invested in putting the intersets of others ahead of your own... what kind of a return are you likely to get on that, here?
this whole place just doesn't make any sense.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1100843
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20180816/msgs/1101008.html