Posted by hog80ci on September 8, 2003, at 21:46:39
I've been in recovery from addiction for almost 22 years. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder in 1999, about a year after I got back fro a tour of duty in Korea. The last thing I wanted to do was take meds. I was afraid I wouldn't be "clean" anymore.
After much prayer and meditation I decided I was still clean. I think I've been depressed my whole life. I used drugs to hide it and hide from it. Medicine, religion, and psychiatry may not not be sufficient for us to stay clean, but they are not useless either. I've had to examine why I take drugs now as well as how I take them. I take A-Ds because without them the hole can get very deep and very dark. I accept that I am an addict. I also accept that I have depression. A-Ds help keep depression under control for me. They are not "happy pills", I don't get high with them.
I've taken prescribed pain meds for sugeries and have had injections in my back to help keep a bulging disc under control. The difference is that now I take meds like they are prescribed and only for the bare minimum amount of time. I don't read "take 1 every hours" to mean "take 4 every hour until you blackout."
I think medical science and technology are gifts. They help me have a better life. I am grateful for them. I am still clean.
take care
Jim
poster:hog80ci
thread:258232
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20030903/msgs/258232.html