Posted by Lorne on August 8, 2005, at 8:37:48
In reply to Re: meds?, posted by Sonya on August 7, 2005, at 11:09:58
Being supportive takes many forms. The one most everyone associates with being supportive is sympathy, or as Carl Rodgers would call it, unconditional postive regard.
Offering somone sympathy FEELS good, and it FEELS good to to know someone is sympathetic with your feelings. However, thats one of sympathy's downfalls, it feels good. Sooner or later you get used to it, its almost addictive.
It also cost nothing to give or recieve sympathy. These days, more often than not the worse you behave the more of it you get (thank you 4th wave movent).
Sympathy is also passive, not-future oriented, non-energizing, non-directional and indiscriminate.
"Beating up" on someone in need of help or who asks for direction is nothing more than ego building at someone else's expense. However, not telling someone what you know to be the truth, or wise, or practical because they want "sympathy" is patronizing and infantilizing, which I'm not going to do either.
Lorne
poster:Lorne
thread:537421
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050722/msgs/539069.html