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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
...Biological clock is ticking.
Kinda
Sorta
I do think about it a bit.
I don't know that I'd be able to walk carrying all that weight around (seriously).
I wonder what they'd be like.
My kids.
Would they look like me?
Laugh like me?
Have my sense of humour?
Be mentally f*cked up?
Grow to hate me like I hate my mother?
Posted by stresser on April 24, 2005, at 19:34:42
In reply to I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
I wondered the very same thing, and had the same thoughts you are having right now. After I gave birth to my daughter, I knew there was nothing in this world that would compare to having a child. You really don't know what you are missing. I know we write about the drama, and all of our promblem, but I wouldn't go back and do it any differently. If you don't get along with your mother, then don't raise your children like she raised you. You know what not to do.
It's hard, and mistakes are made every day, but you learn from them. Don't worry about the weight gain, just get excercise and try not to overeat. You will be able to walk, everyone does. Look at all the people in this world! They all got here the same way! I was probably the most chicken of all to have a child (be pregnant), and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Not even close! My son looks like my husband, and my daughter looked like my husband until around the age of 16, now she looks a little like me.
I tell them I think they are the greatest, and they are my world. But I do have a life, and it doesn't revolve around them. We are doing our best, and just like other families, taking it day by day.
I realized it would have been a shame to live my entire life not having children, knowing how much they bring to my life. Would I have been: Bored? Yes, Lonely? Yes, Old? Yes!!!! I would have missed out on the greatest thing that ever happend to me. -L
Posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 19:55:17
In reply to I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
For an opposing viewpoint...
:)
I love my son dearly and wouldn't trade him for the world.
But if I had trouble concieving, I wouldn't have gone to extraordinary lengths or adopted.
I love my son and delight in him.
But I would have been just as happy and fulfilled childless. I wouldn't have been lonely or sad. I had a million things to do with my time. My husband and I enjoyed each other, perhaps more than we do with a child and slightly opposing parenting styles.
So as a happy mom with an absolutley delightful and nearly trouble free son, I can also say that being childless would have led to just as fulfilling a life for me.
I'm not sure that external circumstances like children or marriage can lead to internal fulfillment.
Which is not to say that I could lose him now that I have him. I know him as a human being now and I couldn't bear losing that relationship. Not merely because he's my son, but because he's a special wonderful human being. (I don't want the fates to misinterpret what I said. I wouldn't want to live without my son now that I know him.)
Posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 21:11:55
In reply to I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
Hmm. Thanks for that guys. Interesting... Interesting...
I'm not quite ready to have kids yet ;-)
But I used to think that I NEVER wanted to have them, but now I am realising that I would quite like to - one day. Not ready yet though.I really think that I wouldn't be able to stand up. I have feet / leg injuries. It is hard enough for me to bear my weight. I just realised that the other day. That I probably would be in a wheelchair through most of my pregnancy. That is probably something I'll have to plan for.
I don't even have a partner yet (sigh)
And I wouldn't want to do this by myself.
I am too erratic.
I would need someone who could be there for them when I could not be.
Someone who is willing to take at least half of the responsibility for all the day to day stuff as well.
Because my career is important to me
(Well... Assuming it ever gets up off the ground)
;-)
But I can feel those maternal feelings starting to bubble up to the surface...
Biological clock is ticking...
But one day
One day
And not today.
And not for a while yet.
Posted by stresser on April 26, 2005, at 14:20:29
In reply to Re: I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 21:11:55
Don't worry Alexandra, I never thought I wanted to have any either. It will work out, just take whatever comes your way! Enjoy each day for what it is, and try not to look back with any regrets! -L
Posted by Toph on April 26, 2005, at 18:00:47
In reply to I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
You are a good student,
You are a good friend,
You are smart and caring,
You are determined but gentle.You would be a great therapist,
You are a great writer.
You would be a great parent,
You are a lovely human being.Sometimes life's path
Is a series of choices in a forest.
Sometimes our course is determined for us
Like a strong current in a stream.I hope you find peace wherever your journey takes you alex.
Toph
Posted by Angela2 on June 14, 2005, at 22:38:48
In reply to I wonder if I'll ever have kids..., posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 20:11:03
Alexandra, I too, am not ready for kids today. But I believe one day, I'd like to have one, or some. Pregnancy scares me though. Honestly, I would rather adopt than become pregnant and have hormonal changes and emotional changes and morning sickness and then labor pains. Ick. Sorry. I probably sound like a big baby.
This is the end of the thread.
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