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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
Dinah's response made me think about this. I think we've done it here before but seems like it would be fun to do again.
If you could be your therapist's therapist and ask three questions, what would they be? (And no - you can't ask, "what do you REALLY think of me, because everyone wants to know that!)
I think I would ask,
"What does a typical Friday look like for you? (since he doesn't see clients on Friday)"How old were you when you lost your virginity?"
"What hurts your feelings?"
Posted by Dinah on July 3, 2009, at 14:08:40
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
What a wonderful idea!
I'll have to think on it though. Since most of the questions in my mind have something to do with myself. :)
But to truly change places, I'd have to put myself out of the equation, at least for my own purposes.
Hmmm... I want to be careful in what I ask, since there are some things I'd just rather not know about him. For example, I don't even want to consider the possibility that my therapist ever had a virginity to lose, much less that he lost it. :)
(I did get to be on the other chair at least a bit today, as we talked about his motivations in the assignment, and Therapygirl's situation. But I'm sure he carefully constructed his answers to fit my best interests.)
Posted by workinprogress on July 3, 2009, at 18:56:57
In reply to Re: If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Dinah on July 3, 2009, at 14:08:40
Interesting. I've been thinking in this mode a bit lately. Last year I decided it was weird that I was so close to this person, yet we'd never shared a meal. And, I wanted to celebrate our year together and what I'd learned. So- we had an anniversay "outing"- a picnic in the park. Monday we are repeating the event in honor of our second anniversary.
So- I decided I wanted to ask her a few questions. There's two I plan on asking her:
1) what have you learned from me?
2) why, when you seem so together, did you stay so long with your ex?And then there's the one I won't ask because I just kind if know it's off limits.
What was it you worked so hard on in your therapy (she often says "I know what it's like to sit there, I've been there"- she spent 14 years in therapy), what were your challenges/issues?
Maybe I'll cheat and ask: how do my life lessons and challenges intersect with yours?
I'll let you all know how it plays out- but maybe I'll get some good ideas from this thread- it's a good one daisy!
WIP
Posted by antigua3 on July 3, 2009, at 19:28:33
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
I ended up with four. Hope that doesn't ruin the game?
1. Do you treat your patients so formally and coldly because it's part of your technique and you actually think it's good for them?
2. Why are you afraid to show your patients that you care? Or do you really not care?
3. How do you juggle your young family, your research and your practice? Is it because you compartmentalize so well that your patients feel like you're not always engaged in them when you have a session?
4. How can you let money come between you and a patient in need. Are you really that greedy?
antigua
Posted by annierose on July 3, 2009, at 23:01:55
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
I think you could ask your t "what hurts your feelings?" - - - it could be an interesting topic for me when I can't seem to say what's on my mind.
I think I'd like to know what motivated her to become a therapist (the "real" reason - not the "I wanted to help people" reason).
I would ask her: what type of parents did she have (as a child and their relationship now if still alive)? and what is her relationship with her siblings? She seems like an only child to me - or the eldest child. I asked once and she does have siblings - - - funny that I don't see her with siblings.
Who she voted for in the last election?
What is her favorite thing to make for dinner?
Posted by seldomseen on July 4, 2009, at 10:36:04
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
This was a very thought provoking question.
Thinking about it I discovered that I know a fair bit about my therapist, which means (to me) he must trust me a lot.
I would ask the 3 following questions:
Is it empathy or training?
What was the most difficult time in your life?
What is your favorite thing to do?
Seldom
Posted by obsidian on July 4, 2009, at 20:25:16
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
What does it mean to be a father?
What do you love to do?
What makes you angry?
Posted by Poet on July 5, 2009, at 13:33:17
In reply to If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by Daisym on July 3, 2009, at 13:08:56
1. are you gay?
if she says yes (which I suspect she would)
2. how long was the father of your children in your life before you knew you were?
3. is your therapy business partner more than just a business partner?
I've suspected she's gay since our first session and she's shared so much of her personal life that I wonder why she keeps her sexual orientation in the closet so to speak. I know what her father did for a living, what area she grew up in, who she voted for and that she has three kids and two grandchildren so it's not like I don't know personal things.
Poet
Posted by onceupon on July 5, 2009, at 21:28:53
In reply to Re: If you could ask 3 questions... » Daisym, posted by Poet on July 5, 2009, at 13:33:17
Great thread.
What do you find most challenging about being a parent? (She has young children.)
How has the work changed for you over time? (She's been in practice 10+ years.)
What are the sides of yourself that you don't show often (or at all) to others?
Posted by sunnydays on July 12, 2009, at 9:04:17
In reply to Re: If you could ask 3 questions..., posted by onceupon on July 5, 2009, at 21:28:53
Great thread -- I have been missing my T a lot lately and had a dream last night that someone called me to say that he was never coming back because he had 29 children in different states and therefore didn't get 'tenure', even though it was agreed he was a wonderful T. (weird, I know, even for me).
1. Tell me more about your struggles with anxiety as a young adult. What did you figure out about them in therapy? (I want to know more about what his 'issues' are - but I'm concerned it might be more so I can take care of him and avoid mentioning anything that might bother him, and that wouldn't be helpful).
2. Why did you decide to become a T? Did you decide that before or after you had the drug addiction problems? (I'm just nosy, I guess. He doesn't really talk about his drug addiction with me hardly ever - it wouldn't be relevant to my therapy at all - and I want to know more about it just because I'm curious)
3. How did you meet your wife? How did you propose to her? What is she like and why do you love her? (I've never really had a loving relationship modeled for me and I'm dying to know what one is like - the only question of the three I could actually see myself asking.)
sunnydays
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