Posted by Bob on September 13, 1999, at 8:38:37
In reply to Re: Depression and Relationships--barb, posted by roo on September 13, 1999, at 7:57:05
> It's only been in the past year or so I've admitted
> it was a big deal...before I always felt like I
> was feeling sorry for myself if I thought about it
> or made something out of it....
>
> I guess the saddest thing for me is that I find it
> so hard to feel loved and cared for, and that I can't
> seem to feel ok about any of my feelings, they all
> seem "wrong"--especially anger and depression--I always
> feel like I'm going to be left/abandoned if I let it
> all hang out.Roo, that sounds so familiar it's bringing me to tears. So often, especially when dealing with charged emotions, I can't help but feel I'm stuck back at 8 yrs old. Then, whenever the slightest hint of self-pity crept in, I'd beat myself up thinking that I was inventing things, I was just being weak, that because of all this I didn't deserve anyone's attention or good will.
Geez, kids can come up with some pretty twisted, acrobatic reasoning. And I'm *still* pretty good at it.
Cheers,
Bob
poster:Bob
thread:11168
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990829/msgs/11509.html