Posted by Adam on April 19, 2000, at 12:20:05
In reply to Am I gay?, posted by Andrew on April 17, 2000, at 3:25:59
Hey, Andrew,
For one thing, as many people here have suggested, you are probably
a bit young to be too worried about issues of sexual orientation.
Having said that, you and I both know that at your age your body is
(and probably has been for a year or two) changing pretty rapidly,
as well as your level of curiosity about all things sexual. Who
hasn't heard of the stereotype of teenage boys being fixated on sex
and how to get it.A lot later in life (in my early twenties) I went through a period
of deep (though completely irrational) concern about my sexual
orientation. Luckily, at the time I was getting intensive psychotherapy
for obsessive compulsive disorder, and my doctor helped me a great
deal in dealing with issues of sexual identity.I think the most helpful thing he taught me is that, although we have
this rigid system of classifying people as gay, straight, or bisexual,
the reality of human behavior is far more complicated. Many people
who are "straight" have had pleasurable homosexual fantasies, or even
acutal homosexual experiences, but just have a strong preference for
the opposite sex. The same goes for "gay" people. Many people who
prefer the same sex have lived completely "straight" lifestyles for years
without even realising they are "gay" until after they are married and
have kids. The truth is, people are complex. Some theorize we are
all to some degree bisexual, but can lean heavily toward heterosexual or
homosexual preferences.I personally have no idea what is the best way to classify human beings
in terms of their sexual behavior. I question whether or not such
classifications are even useful. Mostly, I think, people just have their
own preferences, and ought to be free to simply enjoy what they enjoy
without having a label put on them. You have plenty of time to learn
about yourself and about your own likes and dislikes, and I urge you to
wait until you feel comfortable with whatever makes you happiest
emotionally before you explore sexuality with another person.> i am 14, and I used to have a homosexual friend who was constantly filling me with the idea that i was gay, for his personal benefit. This was becasue he was attracted to me. However, one day I looked at him and thought he looked pretty cool with his new style. Since then I have these thoughts that perhaps I am homosexual. Despite the fact that I do not wish to be these thoughts are beginning to scare me. I dont know whether this means i ama gay or if it is just some normal thing guys go through or what. please help me!!
poster:Adam
thread:30294
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000411/msgs/30581.html