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Re: transference or...?

Posted by allisonm on July 15, 2000, at 10:23:21

In reply to Re: transference or...?, posted by shar on July 14, 2000, at 23:46:28

julesvox,

CindyW turned me onto a book a couple of months ago called "In Session: The relationship between women and their therapists" by Deborah Lott.

It has large sections devoted to the subject of transference and countertransference. Mostly, it urges the patient to talk about their feelings with their therapist because that is an important part of the therapy. But it also has some good common-sense things that I hadn't thought about before that helped me get past some fantasies about my own therapist.

Lott says there is a difference between a patient having a crush or strong feelings toward a therapist and the patient having an agenda "to get" the therapist. Fond feelings are normal, because the relationship by necessity has to be close. But if you search yourself and find you have more of an agenda to try to win over your therapist, it's something that needs to be dealt with, talked about. Or that's the gist, I think.

That said, I haven't had the nerve to talk with my own therapist about my transference.

Take care.

Allison


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