Posted by ethan on January 31, 2002, at 13:58:35
In reply to Re: Sex All the Time... » ethan, posted by bob on January 31, 2002, at 12:15:09
> Wouldn't you say that if somebody masturbates 5 times a day, that by default, it would be detracting from putting their energy in to other activities that would be more socially rewarding?So masturbation is not valuable because it is not something that is "more socially rewarding", i.e., "selfish"??? A person's energy is his or her own to channel as s/he decides, not an automatic obligation to seek social rewards. I know someone who writes professionally, is very successful in his career, masturbates three times a day (regularly, as that is what is comfortable for him and he has the opportunity to do so), and has a happy wife and kid on the way. He has a solid social network, does not have any OCD problems, and is a Good Person to boot. ;-) Masturbation being a waste of time or energy? Bah humbug!
Naturally, masturbation is only worthwhile if you WANT to do it. If ANY activity is compulsive, whether it be compulsive cleaning, washing, eating, exercising, or masturbating/engaging in sex, there is a problem with Compulsive Behavior, not necessarily the behavior itself is to blame. Never blame the behavior for the -ism, though the challenge is conquering the behavior as a perpetual "threat" to wellness. In the case of sexual compulsion, this is most unfortunate because sex is an inherently pleasurable experience, culminated most often in climax (you don't get that "high" from eating, washing or cleaning -- just exhaustion); it's really a crime that sex is still seen through the eyes of Victorian culture as something inherently "less than"...a crime for those with their compulsions focused on sex that such truly wonderful experiences are tainted by the physicall and emotional degradation that OCD performs on any compulsive activity.
> >I have trouble seeing how doing something like that so frequently would not be associated with an obsessive preoccupation.
Certainly, because this would simply not be right For You. But it isn't an automatic Red Flag that something is wrong. Sex drives are as varied as people are; it's wrong to judge a sex drive (low or high) as being inappropriate so long as that person is content with the situation and is not made to feel by a partner that s/he is somehow "inadequate". With prejudgements about sex abounding in Western civilization it's no wonder Sex becomes the scapegoat of a lot of misdirected social criticism.
poster:ethan
thread:92301
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020131/msgs/92380.html