Posted by AMD on June 5, 2004, at 17:19:51
In reply to Re: book suggestions, posted by linkadge on June 5, 2004, at 17:08:01
I guess that is true, the lows can be worse than the highs -- I just never was depressed or more "high" than normal my entire life. I think after I started Celexa I started to feel reallllly good, like life was opening up for me. Perhaps that was hypomania, or perhaps it was the fact that prior to that my self-esteem had been low, I'd had an eating disorder, I was unhealthy, staying up all night, etc., and Celexa helped me get to a normal state. I stayed that way -- highly energized, motivated, ambitious, happy -- for three to four years. Then I began drinking and everything started to crash. However, in hindsight, I look back at those days as the "gold standard" and although I eventually started to get high and hypomanic, I do remember times when I wasn't so euphoric that were still much better than now. For example, I've never felt so braindead, insecure about myself, unable to organize thoughts and complete tasks. So I feel worse off in so many ways...
Then again, I am a textbook case. First had a major depression, Celexa helped me get past that. Four years later I had pushed into hypomania, and drinking spells would drive me into depression. Now I'm fighting symptoms of both, and I haven't felt happy, capable of even leaving town, in months. So I'm frustrated that the medicines are keeping me this way, as opposed to helping me. But I will have faith.
As to AP's, I can take those. I have had very bad experiences. I took a 2.5 mg dose of Zyprexa almost two months ago, and it kicked me into a depression that has not subsided. It also gave me dry mouth and stupor for two full weeks! From ONE dose!
a
poster:AMD
thread:353808
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040602/msgs/354089.html