Posted by barbaracat on July 7, 2004, at 13:53:58
In reply to Re: Lamictal Survey, posted by Harlock on July 7, 2004, at 12:14:47
Hi All,
Well, my attempts to let 'er rip and throw myself on the mercy of the Fates without meds didn't work. Yet again. Everything was becoming a crisis in my life. I now realize how that weird wild energy that's part of bipolar can rip one's life apart. It makes everything so intense, everything was so personal and tragic and it was affecting my marriage, my friendships, my family relations. Pissed off, black moods, crying -- for good reasons, all of it, but sooooo sensitive. Called the HMO crisis line and my pdoc called back and put me back on lithium. This was last week and I can't tell you how much better I'm doing. Even the next day that wild jaggy energy started smoothing out.I am bipolar. That's me. I finally accept that however my childhood and life events molded me, my physical component is mis-wired and without addressing that malfunction, I get crazed. I can't reason any longer, can't do my spiritual practice, can't process anything. The hurt spirals out of control and becomes unmanageable and then my life and relationships get messed up causing more stress.
So I thank God for lithium. So far it's doing the trick and I hope it doesn't poop. I see my pdoc today and am going to talk about replacing Ambien with Seroquel for sleep and to help with the bleak despairing psychosis of mixed states, should that beast decide to rear it's ugly head again. Wish me luck, friends, but so far so good. - BarbaraCat
poster:barbaracat
thread:9730
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040704/msgs/363767.html