Posted by snapper on July 5, 2006, at 4:14:58
In reply to Re: Rumination----- » snapper, posted by Squiggles on July 1, 2006, at 20:56:53
> I wonder if you have not become so involved
> and obsessed in your business to begin with,
> as part of your temperament, and now it's
> not helping at all.
>
Hey Squiggles, thanks for the reply and I am sorry for you academia loss(s) it all hurts. I ran my business very "to a "T" and even my old Pdoc....Said to me that I was tooo obsessive to be in the kind of business I was in. I have been in it for half of my 39 years... plus 4 or 5 years of my life....how, at this late date even begin to think of anything else? Especially when I do not have the cognitive and memory skills to even consider retraining my brain for a different kind of carreer. Sometimes I really feel f9*c#D!I still have an ideal of my old profession but it has changed sooo much in the last 6 to seven years and is so much more competitive. I just don't see how I could compete. Especially when I was litterally the origional in this biz in my major metro city!! Yes there is a lot of other legal garbage that is and was intertwined with my ultimate professional, personal and business demise. I have prayed and prayed and asked for grace and redemption and here I am. Broke and still very anxious and depressed......and on and on...... God said he had a plan for me....I am sorry that I continue to post and ramble.....I just don't get it. Getting out of bed everyday to take meds that usually don't give much help , is just to exist to exist. Taking space up on this -what I used to think Beautiful big opportunistic planet- I have been robbed by this illness. Some are by my own hand and others are out of my control.I guess all I can do is all I can do!!
Snapper
poster:snapper
thread:663183
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060701/msgs/664130.html