Posted by rabble_rouser on July 3, 2005, at 15:40:08
In reply to Question about insight and motivation?, posted by Racer on March 27, 2005, at 15:36:08
Dear Racer,
I thought I would post a follow up to this. I hope you still check back on the board from time to time.
In all honesty, I have not suffered with AN, however I had a partner who suffered with bulimia. I have had recurring depression all of my life. The 'disconnect' you are talking about - Im not exactly sure what that means - are you talking about the one little click that makes you decide to really tackle your issues?
I hope the following is of help to you. I have lately made a big breakthrough with my depression. Some time ago my therapist suggested he felt that I had big issues with Approval Addiction (i.e. the endless need for the validation and appreciation of all other human beings). It has taken me a long time to really see what he was driving at, but by using written arguments to convince myself why my approval addiction harms me, and achieves nothing for me, and then going out and trying to act in accordance with that belief, my conviction of it has grown stronger. I am happy to say that my depression finally feels as though it is lifting.
In my partner's case, the day she committed to getting better was when she realised exactly how her bulimia was harming her, when I found an article about its effect on the female reproductive system. She had always wanted children, and when she realised that her illness could stop that from happening, the change happened. She sought out a CBT therapist and began treatment.
I hope this method is effective for you:
1) List all the reasons why you think your AN may be beneficial to you.
2) List all the reasons why you think it is bad for you. Try to extend the arguments into all areas of your life. Think of effect on family / friends, your health, future etc. This step can be hard. For just a moment, pretend you are someone else thinking about it. Try to see how a third party might view the effects of your illness on you.
You may find that some of your arguments as to why it is bad for you hit a chord in your mind. Try to concentrate on those arguments that seem most powerful. Maybe ask others for examples and see if you can find even small reasons to agree with them. I had exactly the same problem when I started - you can grasp it intellectually, but its hard to get it at gut level. The most powerful way to 'get it' is to write out the arguments and alternative beliefs, and then ACT IN ACCORDANCE WITH THEM.
It is an odd quirk of the human mind that action actually precedes belief. An example is driving a car - when you first get in it you are nervous as hell. Only time behind the wheel and experience can make you confident.
One of the best books I have read on this method is How to Accept Yourself by Windy Dryden (amazon etc).
This is only a first step, but it is the one I took some time ago that has led me to where I am now. Have you tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? I have heard that it is very affective for AN.
poster:rabble_rouser
thread:476283
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/eating/20050314/msgs/522995.html