Posted by Lllucy on December 21, 2003, at 14:46:36
In reply to It does not grow easier each year...., posted by zenhussy on December 20, 2003, at 3:39:51
Hi
I'm sorry for your loss and continued pain. Your message resonates with me, that sense of being a novice at grief. I got the impression that you still can't really cry or 'get to' the pain you still feel - am I way off base?My dad died when I was 22, and I did not know how to allow feelings for myself then, either. My family, always estranged from each other, never did mourn together. 25 years later, I still wonder how to nurture and heal myself. Feelings so buried, so tightly held onto and I don't know how to release them, even though I understand that that it would be good to do. Knowing there are tears inside, and being able to allow them are such different things, I am frustrated that I haven't yet figured out how to bridge these separate things. I find that I go through a similar 'shutting down' in the face of more recent losses too. I think our culture is kind of phobic about mourning and grief, which doesn't help.
Thank you for your post. I wish I had something helpful to offer you, other than 'I hear you'. I will follow this thread to see if you (we) get any insight or words of practical wisdom from others. Take care,
Lucy
poster:Lllucy
thread:291836
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/292153.html