Posted by bookgurl99 on June 11, 2003, at 22:07:53
In reply to Re: Changing Therapists - What Sex??, posted by DissociativeJane on June 11, 2003, at 10:07:52
> I am curious to know how you know that your therapist is a lesbian. My therapist has told me hardly anthing about herself and quite honestly, I prefer not knowing.
I asked for a list of referrals for gay, lesbian, or gay-supportive therapists from my local Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender Community Center.I preferred seeing a lesbian because in the past heterosexual counselors kept focusing on my sexual identity instead of my real issues. The fallout from being gay -- rejection by parents, etc. -- did need to be worked through, but not the gay thing itself. That was nailed solid a long time ago. They would say,"maybe you don't accept yourself for being gay," when there were really other things going on. In a way, I had to see a gay therapist in order to talk about non-gay stuff.
I also ended up having to educate the heterosexual therapists. One woman actually said,"Don't you want to have a family?" I said,"I _will_." And while she was good for short-term therapy (it was a college thing, where i was just there for a short while), I would never trust someone like that to help me with a relationship issue. Even if she thinks she's gay-supportive, her question belies that she doesn't think gays have real families.
In the end, it helps to have someone who's on the same page as you are but different enough to give you some perspective.
poster:bookgurl99
thread:230679
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/233327.html