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Posted by cerodwen on July 5, 2003, at 16:37:17

I was diagnosed Bipolar when I was 18, New Years 2000. Before then everything was going so great, I was doing well in school, getting good grades, I'd been accepted to a good school, I had great friends, we would party a lot, and have good talks, just a lot of fun all the time. I had a nice boyfriend. (I'm leaving some things out, the april before my stepdad had committed suicide so my mom was in a terrible mood all the time, crying jags constantly) but for me I was "happy" and then I went off to college and got depressed, so depressed I had to come home, and then I came back and got manic, so manic I was psychotic and had to be hospitalized, but before that I was lucky enough to alienate all of my friends except for one.

Well, now it's been a long time since then. It hasn't been easy in the between times, like gaining over a hundred pounds from lithium, I look like an old lady with all the wrinkles and stretch marks. (I lost the weight with Topamax) But NOW. I don't have any friends. And I don't know why. Well, I know I am really shy and sometimes I just can't talk and I get really depressed but... I feel like maybe I'm so damn scarred I just can't relate to normal folks and look them in the eye.

Did this happen to any of you after you got diagnosed? did you lose your friends? spend time without friends? how did you make friends again? how open are you with your friends about these issues?

-Deirdre


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:cerodwen thread:239553
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/239553.html