Posted by KindGirl on March 6, 2004, at 8:08:10
In reply to Question for everyone on odd parenting, posted by Elle2021 on March 6, 2004, at 2:44:28
Dear Elle,
First off let me say this...I don't know anything about anything. I "used" to know everything about everything but I am learning in therapy that I really don't know anything at all.
!!!!
So with that caveat let me say this: this is sexual abuse according to my T. The reason I say this is because I remember my dad, who was very nurturing and the only nurturer I had, used to hold me on his lap and put his hand just inside the top of my underwear...kind of like Al Bundy on the old show Married W/Children if you know that show. I said this casually in t. one day and T. stopped me immediately and said, "that is sexual abuse. that is huge."...and she said that sexual abuse does not just mean penetration or outright sexual relations...it can be sexual talk, inappropriate behavior (and YES THIS WAS EXTREMELY ODD AND WRONG PARENTAL BEHAVIOR, SEXUAL OR NOT)...I have 3 kids and was a school teacher for over 10 years....this is not healthy or normal.My dad, after the divorce and he left, used to watch pornos with me and my brother. I usually left the room and went in another room until they had their fill. He thought it was cool and let my brother watch them when he was gone at work. This was my nurturer...the one who I thought was my daddy...a safe person who would never leave. Not only did he leave but he became a total perv.
Your friend has my heart on this one. I am sorry this was confusing for her (I bet it was) and I am not saying her dad is a perv or this was sexual in any way. Just sharing what my t. has told me and remember I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!!!!! I am fumbling in the dark so forgive me if I am way out of line. I just wanted to respond to your Q.
poster:KindGirl
thread:321016
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040303/msgs/321057.html