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Re: Meaning of something T said » tinydancer

Posted by pegasus on March 12, 2004, at 13:39:55

In reply to Re: Meaning of something T said, posted by tinydancer on March 12, 2004, at 1:40:33

Well, but I don't think it has to be that black and white either. I agree that not all relationships are "based on" transference. And I agree that transference is a kind of projection. I also think that transference can happen at times in almost any relationship. And I don't think it's a bad thing.

For example, I think my relationship with my husband involves some transference from my relationship with my sister. Except that my husband is way more supportive and attentive and approving. But we relate in a similar way that I related to my sister, and it feels like he fills a similar role in my life (it's really complicated). So, in a way, he is helping me heal from some of the negative stuff that I got from my sister. It's not a bad thing. Actually, maybe it's a really good thing. And, of course, I have a completely real relationship with my husband also. He's my best friend, and I love him dearly, for his own self. There are just these other things that I bring into it that didn't originate with him. Does that make sense?

At least, that's how I see it.

- p

 

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