Posted by KindGirl on May 15, 2004, at 1:37:59
Hey everyone,
I miss my t. because she is on vacation. I saw her last week and she gave me a little stuffed animal that she keeps on her desk to keep while she is gone. I told her I would take him everywhere I go and I have. That was her suggestion.Tonight I met with a group of ladies I used to hang out with and it was from my "pre therapy" days....in other words, total deniers....totally disconnected people...people from my old world. It was fine...I was able to keep a superficial conversation face on, but when I got in my car and saw the stuffed animal on the passenger seat I started sobbing.
My t. would say "this is real." The little stuffed animal is what is real because the little animal represents us...my relationship with t...what is true, what is real, that is where healing happens. Being disconnected and in denial is not real. But when I see that little toy I realize that my t. is not here, I really am alone, I really am in therapy, I really do have problems, I really was abused severely, I really need help, I really have no friends now....
Anyone have any thoughts or musings on why this little stuffed toy could have such an impact on me? I want to word this post carefully so I don't cross over into "social" because I know you guys and really feel safe here, even if I am posting off topic (I hope not). This IS a therapy issue because I am struggling with missing my t. and only having this representation here of her to hold until she gets back.
Thanks for listening. Now I am going to go cry myself to sleep. :(
poster:KindGirl
thread:347028
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040512/msgs/347028.html