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Re: not knowing about your therapist's real life

Posted by joslynn on May 18, 2004, at 11:14:07

In reply to not knowing about your therapist's real life, posted by LG04 on May 18, 2004, at 7:33:16

This is an interesting question.

My therapist is divorced. She has said that, and when I asked one time, she said her marriage was "difficult" and that even good marriages are a lot of work. She barely ever mentions it.

This little part of me wonders, since her marriage ended in divorce, how can she help me try to figure out who would be a good guy to marry...? But then I think, well, she has probably learned from her mistakes and sometimes, people can see patterns in other people's lives much better than in their own.

For example, I am NO relationship expert, but when my friends talk to me about relationship problems, they say I am a good listener and help them clarify what the issues are.

My pdoc is married. I was rather curious and jealous about his wife, then saw a picture of her (not via any clandestine methods). When I saw that she was not a gorgeous trophy wife, just a reasonably attractive, conservative-looking suburban woman, I lost a lot of that curiosity and envy.

Also, he spends more time with his patients (6 full days a week) than with his family, so in a way, the spouse could envy the clients. It could go both ways.

Ideally, I would like to find someone who seems to have a really solid, great marriage, someone maybe 10-20 years older than me, and glean what I can from them. My therp is divorced like I said, and if I had to guess, I would guess that pdoc is not in an overly happy marriage. Just a vibe I get.

I would like to find some sort of "relationship mentor" to give me a clue of how to find the right person and how to have a successful, happy marriage. My parents would NOT be the right mentors for this assignment!


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poster:joslynn thread:348081
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040512/msgs/348165.html