Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2004, at 21:38:55
In reply to forgiveness, posted by henrietta on July 20, 2004, at 19:00:05
Magnamimous nor Gracious, huh? Interesting choice of words.
Yeah, I'd agree. False forgiveness isn't something I traffic in. I don't believe in true forgiveness either, not without the three R's. Remorse, taking Responsibility, and Reparations.
I believe in not holding on to anger. And I believe in taking responsibility for whatever role I might play in a conflict. And I believe that what I do is what I do, and doesn't depend on what someone else does. In other words, it's my responsibility to do the right thing even if someone else hasn't.
What I really hate is forgiving someone who hurt someone else. Jewish law says that only those who have been hurt can grant forgiveness for a crime. I am utterly disgusted at all the people who rush to give forgiveness to people who have done others harm, but absolutely no harm to the person granting forgiveness. Mass murderers and the like.
Nor do I particularly care to judge the severity of harm to someone else as being minor. Again, I sort of think that's up to the person harmed. I still hear "kids will be kids" ringing in my ears.
And even after forgiveness, I don't believe that forgiveness means trusting again. You might be able to tell I'm a Dr. Laura fan when I say "Forgive, but tie up the camel."
poster:Dinah
thread:368381
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040716/msgs/368418.html