Posted by shrinking violet on September 12, 2004, at 18:41:22
In reply to Re: not sure i can / should keep doing this, posted by LG04 on September 12, 2004, at 12:47:41
Wow LG, Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds like you have a very mature and grounded way of thinking about your relationship with your T, both present and future. It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into how you would handle a future relationship. It sounds like, whatever you decide will be the right choice for you. I hope it all works out in whatever way you wish.
I agree that all T and client relationships are very different. I think my T and I are close, and she does tell me things about herself, both factual and otherwise. She has recently admitted a "vulnerability" where I am concerned, especially when she tries to "get tough" with me. Perhaps that might be a warning indicator that her judgement regarding me might not be unbiased, but I have faith in her as a T and as a person, and I know she would never knowingly harm me.
I view my T as very much a person, not someone who is on a pedestal, and she is very human to me. I think maybe that's why it makes it so hard to think I may never see her again after we terminate, because she is such a warm and decent person, someone who I would be lucky to have in my life in some way. There aren't many people out there like that (none that I've come across, anyway!). I think that I could keep in touch with my T in some way, writing letters and sending cards, perhaps visiting her once or twice a year (she has said as much regarding both modes of contact), but a part of me fears that somehow, we'll lose touch. I'll forget to write, or she might not respond and I'll stop writing, or she might change jobs, etc. But there's also a small part of me that hopes beyond hope that maybe someday, she'll respond to one of my letters and ask to see me.
Maybe some people are meant to meet, and sometimes the circumstances aren't the best. It sounds like you and your T are two of those people, and I like to think that me and my T are in that group also.
Thank you for sharing, and again, good luck.
-SV
poster:shrinking violet
thread:388901
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040911/msgs/390073.html