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Re: Mirrors » alexandra_k

Posted by daisym on February 6, 2005, at 20:22:11

In reply to Mirrors, posted by alexandra_k on February 6, 2005, at 18:32:01

I like all the research you've done -- very interesting articles!

I'll add another definition if I may...

In self psychology, it is believed that clients need three basic things to "shore up" their self structure - Mirroring, idealized parental imago, and twinning (or twinship). Mirroring refers to a child's need to hear the answer to "mirror, mirror, on the wall, whose the fairest of them all? -- You are!" over and over again. Children eventually internalize this voice that tells them they are great and thus develops self-esteem.

Self-psychologists use this technique with adults typically by pointing out a client's existing strengths, not by gratifying the need, necesarily. Clients need and want to know that their therapist likes them and believes in them. Especially if they didn't get this from their parents. The flip side of this for kids is that instead of internalizing a positive parental voice, they become narcissistic or grandiose in an attempt to get noticed and make themselves feel good about themselves.

It is much more complicated than this, but that is the basic outline of it. Hope it helps.

(My therapist uses a lot of self-psychology techniques.)

 

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