Posted by jujube on February 10, 2005, at 20:25:07
In reply to A parent who drank a lot, posted by Dinah on February 10, 2005, at 19:33:11
I'll just put this out there, and I apologize in advance if what I say is out of line.
Perhaps your dad's drinking did have an effect on you, but because you loved your dad so much, it is hard to admit or accept that. You say that your dad was not abusive or violent when he was drinking, but rather his drinking "mellowed" him. So, from a young age, you knew that without alcohol your dad was a different person -perhaps, a much more volatile and moody(?).
I'll just put this out there as well (with no intention to offend). Is is possible that your dad was more demonstrative and loving when he was drinking and that made his drinking ok in the eyes of a child and, later, as an adult?
I don't know, but I think that on some level a parent's drinking would have some effect on a child and the relationship that child has with the parent, and that could well be carried into adulthood.
poster:jujube
thread:456043
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050206/msgs/456069.html