Posted by shrinking violet on May 2, 2005, at 13:37:06
In reply to Re: You are allowed to mourn » shrinking violet, posted by gardenergirl on May 2, 2005, at 9:39:23
>> Well, I suppose if they have never been in an intense therapy, maybe they just don't get it? Which stinks. Because I remember my mother thinking I was too dependent on my T about a year ago. I stopped telling her anything about my therapy after that.
--That's true, but I get the feeling my T feels the same, like I shouldn't be making ending with her this "messy." Or maybe that's my projection, I don't know, but I get that feeling from her sometimes.
>> --Well, if that's all the "human experience" is (and that's all it seems to be, at least for me), then I don't want it.
> Of course you don't. Who would sign up for this pain?--So then if there's a way out, why don't people consider it ok to take it?
>> I think I understand this feeling at least in part. But I have to say, folks will worry whether you want them to or not. And there's plenty of worry and caring and Babble space to go around. So I'll be here, and so will pretty much everyone else whether you feel like posting or not. We're here for you.
--Thank you, I appreciate the kind words. Part of me wants to email my T the link to this thread, but I know I can't do that. And I wouldn't trust her reaction and, at this point, if it's the "wrong" one, it would break me more, and I couldn't chance that. My psych also left a message, wanting me to update her on how I'm doing with the meds she called in for me. So far I've ignored calling her back, b/c I'm afraid I'll spill out the truth and tell her I'm overmedicating b/c I don't want to be conscious. I'd be afraid of her reaction too (I don't need a week locked in a ward, no thanks, and that seems to be their answer for anything to intense), and part of me knows I should call her back out of courtesy, at least, and lie like I usually do.
But the majority of me wants to sleep until it gets dark. So, I think I might go with that option.
Thanks gg, I appreciate your validation right now, especially coming from you who has experienced both sides of the proverbial fence. ;-)
Peace,
sv
poster:shrinking violet
thread:491643
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050428/msgs/492704.html