Posted by Dinah on August 4, 2007, at 8:52:24
In reply to Re: I hate therapy and I don't want to think about it » Dinah, posted by TherapyGirl on August 3, 2007, at 20:52:38
It's nothing really in particular. Just the frequent post therapy headache laid me up for the rest of the day, and I really couldn't afford that workwise.
And it was a session of misattunement. Poorly placed looks of surprise that hurt my feelings. He couldn't hear me, and when he could he didn't understand what I was saying. He was badly distracted, for the second time in two weeks, by his personal life.
And the capper was that he had mistaken me for another client. When he told me with a smile that he was fond of me, I thought he told me that because he knew it would please me. It made me feel special. But in reality, he told me that with a smile because he thought it would infuriate me. He had confused me with a client who detests the word fond, and was teasing me. I made the mistake of mentioning it today as one of the reasons for finally being able to feel his caring (since he had been surprised a couple of sessions ago when I said I did finally feel his caring). So now I feel like an idiot. I feel ashamed for taking it at face value. And I'm angry with myself for bringing it up. If I hadn't I wouldn't have known that he had confused me with another client, and I wouldn't have embarrassed myself by letting him know that I thought he meant it.
Or maybe he did mean it in a way. But I'm still embarrassed.
I did tell him that he wasn't supposed to confuse me with other clients (or at least wasn't supposed to tell me if he did). Very bad form. And I apologized for speaking too softly and in a way he couldn't understand. He said those were little things, and he wasn't angry with me over them. I didn't say anything about the stuff like surprise in the wrong place, because really what was there to say. :(
poster:Dinah
thread:773776
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070726/msgs/773888.html