Posted by sassyfrancesca on June 12, 2008, at 9:56:54
In reply to Re: What is my therapist?(Afraid of Going Upstairs » sassyfrancesca, posted by DAisym on June 11, 2008, at 21:02:52
> Hi, Daisy:
I think it is interesting that your therapist changes based on who you need him to be, not who he presents himself to be.
I am not sure what you mean. He is who he is.
Roles change, yes, but who we are shouldn't really change when the roles change. I don't know if I'm making sense.
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> It seems like it would help to see your therapist as who he is - a warm, empathic person who wants to help you. Or a funny, witty person who wants to help you.He is all of those things. The reason I went to him (church abuse, and he is an expert in the subject of spiritual abuse)....when that mess was all over, I stayed with him.
It might then help you see yourself as who you really are, not just the role you are in for other people.
Oh, trust me; I know myself (at least consciously) as much as one can know onesself.
Knowing our core-self, the self that is the essence of who we are, is really important.
I did a lot of work on myself years and years ago; I consider myself my own best friend. In essence, I am my own woman; seems I always have been. I understand myself. I march to my own beat.
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> I'm not very good at this myself, I must admit. I tend to hide behind those roles, trying to figure out how to be whatever it is a particular person needs me to be. My therapist just wants me to be me - to feel what I'm feeling, not what I think I should be feeling and he wants me to let him be him - to not introject all my fears into him and then treat that as the reality.Because my t has allowed me to "see" him (his words, I know a LOT about him personally. He told me (I was amazed) that I had taught him "courage."
Thanks for writing!
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> it is very, very hard.
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poster:sassyfrancesca
thread:833922
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080524/msgs/834310.html