Posted by Hermitian on July 31, 2008, at 11:51:42
In reply to Third session with T, posted by Quintal on July 31, 2008, at 11:27:36
I don't get it. CBT is focused on behavior, not goals or plans unless they related to changing behavior.
So that said, what behaviors do you have that you don't like? (rhetorical). If you don't have any, then maybe CBT is not what you need.
However, if you do have specific behaviors you want to change, and you resist plans to address those, then that is an avoidance strategy, because frankly, you just don't want to make the effort or sacrifice for whatever reason. Believe me, I know. In the back of your mind, you're thinking it will be too hard or you will be too uncomfortable, or you actually like the mal-adaptive behavior even though it will have a lousy long-term influence on your quality of life.
Think about something as prosaic as losing weight. A CBT plan that include life-style changes would indeed be an intrusion on somebody who loves to eat. A rejection of the plan based on an argument for autonomy is really a rejection of the plan because the person wants rationalize eating as he does.
So there you have it. You have to be honest with yourself about your motives. Change requires commitment, and if you aren't at least somewhat committed to change, then cease the therapy. You just have to ensure that your retreat is aligned with your values, not with your deficiencies.
I'm an ADD procrastinator. And when I resisted changing my behavior through timelines and challenges, I resisted too. And claimed my autonomy as an absolute. But then I looked myself in the mirror and said to myself, "I value autonomy so much, I would rather goof off and live this sub-optimal life till I die, than work to a future that is bright and hopeful." And when I said that, I knew I was not being consistent with my values. I could not buy into that value prop. It was only then that I committed to change.
poster:Hermitian
thread:843241
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/843246.html