Posted by twinleaf on August 7, 2008, at 19:33:49
In reply to Re: Had my session today » Dinah, posted by Lemonaide on August 7, 2008, at 18:40:44
Hi Lemonaide..I think you have exceptionally good insight into your present situation with both your past and present therapists, and there do seem to be some red flags popping up.
You present therapist has always seemed so seasoned and professional, but he may have gotten knocked off-balance by what happened recently. He really should not be worried about your views of his counter-transference. He should also not worry about anything you write in a blog or on babble...provided you keep your therapists anonymous, and they know you'll do that.. He should also not set limits on what you say: if you need to talk about your former therapist, you should be able to do so as long as you need to. When it's truly over in your mind, you won't need to talk about it any longer. I guess these are the same things which are worrying you, too.
You were doing SO well with him prior to this episode about seeing the former therapist. I think you had a year and a half of really good work, with real progress, without any negatives that I can remember. I really do hope you can work things out with your present therapist now. If you can't, there is always the possibility of finding a new one. But you don't want to get into a repetitive situation where you can only go so far with one therapist before something causes you to fragment or rupture the alliance you have built up.
I know it's not easy to hear this, but I do think it is very threatening to therapists when they hear from patients that they may be sued, or that their words and actions may be publicly exposed on-line. At the moment, both of the therapists may be feeling a lot of pressure from that. Although it has not (yet) happened to me, I know, as a doctor, that it would be very threatening to me. and would make me want to tranfer any patient who did that. I certainly don't want to be unfairly tough on you, because I have always really liked and admired you, but do you think you could commit to not threatening the therapists with legal action or public exposure, thus inadvertently putting them on the defensive? If I am wrong about this, which I certainly could be, please let me know. I know this is a tough time now, and I don't want to make it any harder than it already is.
You have so many great things going for you. Both therapists seem to have really enjoyed and valued their work with you, and valued you as a person.. Is there a way to keep all those good things going, even while you deal with your anger and rage? (as we all must do).
I do hope this post doesn't seem unduly harsh to you, but if it is, tell me.
poster:twinleaf
thread:844792
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/844854.html